Our Book of the Month Is...

Crispy Charles Crisp travels the country eliminating enemy agents for national security. The only problem is that his victims are innocent people and he's insane. He further thinks that the killings are being blamed on some serial killer in the press. He makes the mistake of trying to kill two burnt-out morons named Spider and Smoky. He moves in with them and devotes every waking moment to their demise. He is so obsessed that they invade his dreams as well. Each attempt backfires and he soon finds that he is the victim. The injury and torture he endures shouldn't even happen to a serial killer. This is a roller coaster ride of laughs as you enjoy the insanity from the point of view of the mad killer. Before long the lines blur that define reality and you find yourself cheering for the maniacs and feeling sorry for the bloodthirsty murderer. H.B. Marcus' Biography: H. B. Marcus was born Marcus Howard Bretschneider on January 7th 1963 in Cambridge Ohio. He was the son of a science teacher who used the art of story telling to teach classes. Marcus has spent most of his life as a musician and a driver. Crispy was born while driving a Mack truck, which he now owns and keeps around as lawn art. Marcus has a wife named Jane and a baby girl who was born in 2000 named Montana Skye. He started writing in 1996 and plans to leave a stack of books for Montana to distribute under the H. B. Marcus name. At long last, "the great American dysfunctional novel" has been written. H.B. Marcus has penned a classic of "dysfunction" in every sentence of the word. Did that make any sense? Well, an afternoon with Marcus's book Crispy will have you wondering if you said what you said or meant what you meant. Crispy is a zany ride through a cleverly crafted carnival cuisine of the uncouth of society. Throughout this tale, main character Charles Crisp attempts to avoid being "stupided" by characters Spider and Smokey. "You two idiots have no idea how happy you have made me ... and all you had to do is die!" This is what Crisp said at one point when he thought he'd finally gotten rid of the pair. But Spider and Smoky suffered their own frustrations with Crisp. "...you don't know what a total drag you are." "Yeah man, you bum us out all the time. You gotta loosen up." To me this book is a creative cross section of Americana; dysfunctional-style. We get a major glimpse into the un-Beaver Cleaver life styles of the inappropriate and irreverent; bikers, mentally ill patients, convicts, drug users and dealers. Marcus weaves cartoon mania ( I felt as if I was watching episodes of Road Runner being played out by the characters) with detective magazine writing (lots of cop interactions gone loco) and pulls it off with a sociological statement about the frustrating war on drugs. All this in 173 pages? Oh, did I forget to mention it is also hilarious? Outstanding job, H.B.- Lynn Barry, author of Puddles I've heard it said many times that humor is the most difficult form of writing. Don't tell that to HB Marcus. He's mastered it the first time out. If you want a fast paced read that has a laugh a line, read Crispy. Want imagery? Try this line from the book. "...I felt a sharp pain as if I had just passed barbed wire while uninating. As I sat doubled over in pain I watched them run out the door. A plastic bag followed them (Smokey & Spider) on the floor as Spider ran with his ankle wrapped in my catheter tube." Say "Ouch", then get an appointment with a doctor for some humor suppression pills because if you read Crispy, you won't be able to stop laughing without them. - Jerry Mohrlang Return to Book of the Month Archive